Should not be taken as a threat,
When you consider the level of cover
Afforded the typical human ass.

Now hands are another matter,
Having been everywhere soiled
And never properly washed.

If you hear kiss my hands,
Take that as a serious threat
And run for the hills!

Unless, of course, it all leads
To the touching of lips
With a total disregard

For what is dirty
And what is clean.